Gender Equality at the Workplace
Posted on July 6, 2016

Gender diversity is the “flavour of the month” at the moment. The case for greater participation of women at senior levels as a driver for high performance has been made and proven over and over again but does not seem to be enough. Progression in gender equity is frustratingly slow.

Organisations struggle to meet women’s needs to attract and retain them. Meeting the needs of women is more complicated than meeting the needs of men. Of course, we are all different and have different needs; however, I propose that women are more different from other women than men are from other men.

I propose the following groups of women exist:

  • Women without children
    • Women who have not had children yet. They may or may not want children at some stage but at the moment they are focused on their careers, relationships and enjoying life.
    • Women who have decided that they do not want to have children and focus on their careers. Their needs tend to be similar to men’s needs.
    • Women who want children and cannot. Either because they have not found a suitable partner or because they are unable to conceive children. These women live with a hidden grief. Confusing these women with women who have voluntarily chosen to not have children can be deeply distressing; however, it is hard to identify them as their grief is very private.
  • Women with children
    • Career women who are ambitious and still want to maintain and grow their career. They work hard to hold down a full time job and meet their parenting commitments.
    • Part time women who work to “pay the bills and keep sane”. They wish to work part-time and are not ambitious.
    • Stay at home mums prefer not to work, or are cut out of work and remain full time parents. These women do significant voluntary work at their children’s schools and in other community groups. They tend to lack confidence from being out of the workplace for awhile. There is often animosity between these women and working women as these women feel that they carry an unfair burden of voluntary work.

No wonder it is hard to develop programs for women!

What is even more problematic is that women in different groups don’t necessarily understand the needs of women from other groups. It is extraordinarily difficult to understand what it is like to be a parent or what it is like to “hit the glass ceiling” if you have not experienced it.

I became a parent at the age of 40. Prior to that, I remember having staff returning to work part-time from maternity leave. I remember wondering with frustration whether we would ever get some useful work from them! After all, most of them seemed to have their work days on a Monday which was either a long weekend or they were on training! Nothing seemed to being produced and whenever I wanted to talk to them, they were not in. It was only after being a parent myself that I understood how hard it must have been for one of my staff who was the main bread-winner, had not recovered from the pregnancy, was still breast feeding, would have been struggling with high levels of hormones leaving her emotional, who had to express milk in her lunch break and was probably worried about her performance at work. To be perfectly frank, I am embarrassed at the lack of compassion that I felt and expressed.

Once I had my child, I returned to work in a new General Management role. Despite only having one child and my husband being home looking after our baby, I was awake at 5am every morning. I was experiencing interrupted sleep. My hormones had still not settled down – I was still breastfeeding when I started back at work and I felt like crying every time there was any conflict. My best description of that year was the feeling of ‘holding on by my fingernails’ and feeling that my career had just ‘gone down the drain’. My greatest complement from my boss was that my performance had not been adversely affected by being a parent – if only he had know how hard it had been.

My own experience of ‘hitting the glass ceiling’ included being interviewed by a panel of 3 men and having to answer questions about my childcare arrangements and how I could possibly think I could do this role if I had taken time out. Another experience included being rejected for a role because the CEO did think that I would answer emails at11pm at night if I was a parent. A third experience involved being told that it would not be possible to do a particular job because ‘most of the key decisions are made in the bar afterwards’. After all, who wants to hear these stories? If we believe them, then they might happen to us!

Men also have different needs but they tend to be less complex:

  • Men who have no children – the majority who are looking for career progression
  • Men who have families and experience the dual pressure of supporting families while helping with childcare duties. These men are also looking for career progression.
  • Men who are working part-time or stay at home while their wives are the main breadwinner. This is a small but growing cohort and our society is not well-equipped to support this ‘no-traditional’ choice.

And, yes, life is tough for men, too! For those who are interested in the impact of gender equity on men, I recommend Michael Kimmel’s TED Talk, “Why gender equity is good for everyone – men included”. My favourite quote from this talk is, “Privilege is invisible to those who have it.”

Personally, I am really looking forward to the day when writing an article like this is unnecessary. Where we run organisations that have systems and managerial practices that are based on building trust and are true meritocracies. For my paper on Accountable and Consistent Leadership click here.

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